Friday, May 30, 2008

It’s Not “Lost” If You’re Weren’t Looking To Keep It

Over the last decade I have made several career changes – which resulted in major life changes. In 2004 I left a financing career in Toronto and moved my life back to Sudbury. Then in 2006 I left a shit hole job in Sudbury and moved my life to Capital City, Canada.

When I got to Capital City I took a job with a brand new small business – an aspiring Acupuncture clinic. I had always wanted to own my own business, and I thought that this would be a great opportunity to find out just how much work is really involved and learn first hand about the ups and downs of entrepreneurial endeavours.

At first, running a small business was fun and exciting. The business had just started, I was their first full-time employee and opportunity was rampant. Over the last 2 years I have seen this business go from an extremely profitable month, to a devastatingly bankrupt month.

I have seen what can happen to a perfectly good business when the owners let personal issues interfere with business needs. I have experienced what can happen when the business plan is fatally flawed. I have transitioned the company through an ownership change, and personally helped the company avoid bankruptcy. I have stuck it out in tough times for the good of the business. I have put my heart and soul into something that didn’t even belong to me. I now know what it will take to make my own business a success.

The last 8 months have been especially stressful. There were days of panic and hopelessness. There were days when I wanted to ram heads through walls. There were days when I wondered how I ended up becoming the pillar for a business that I didn’t even own. Every day I wanted out.

I felt that I couldn’t leave – that I was obligated to stay. The new owners had no idea what they were doing, and I am not the kind of person who leaves people hanging. I wasn’t prepared to deal with the bad karma aftermath of leaving two brand new business owners in the middle of a huge mess.

On Tuesday the business owners informed me that they would “have to let me go.” After thinking about it a bit, the only emotion that kept coming to mind was – RELIEF. A huge sigh would come out and I would think ... ah, it’s not my problem anymore. I would think about all of the mistakes that were made, and the lack owner leadership that the company has and I would think ... ah, it’s not my problem anymore! My mind would race around thinking about all the things that are missing, and that need to be done in order for this business to become profitable and I would rejoice... IT’S NOT MY PROBLEM ANYMORE!!!

I woke up Wednesday morning and I smiled. For the first time in nearly a year I didn’t wake up and immediately begin stressing about all of the things that were wrong with someone else’s business. I hadn’t had any nightmares about work. I hadn’t made any mental lists of things to do. My mind was clear and free and it felt amazing.

As I watched this business rise and fall over the last two years, I became more and more frustrated. If it had been my own business, I would not have run it this way. I would have done everything differently. The frustrating part was that the owners never took my advice. Things like having a business plan, sales projections and budgets are givens – but no one takes my word for it.

When I think about “losing my job” I feel more like I am finally being unburdened by something that has been dragging me down. The shackles have been cut. Someone else has finally taken on the responsibility of owning this business – the owner! Go figure!

While I enjoy my two weeks notice, only one question remains: should I take my red swingline stapler???????????????????




4 comments:

ButterPeanut said...

take the stapler!!

carrice said...

if they ask me to move my desk once more time, i'll burn the building down!

Brianne said...

but that's my... that's my swingline stapler... it's mine and you can't have it... i could burn this whole place down.

Stevie P. said...

I just resigned from my job yesterday. Big changes, special order!